Jubal here with a flashback to almost 2 years ago, March 23, 2008. This was our second blog post and not too many of y'all read it judging by the lack of comments. So were gonna run it up the flag pole again and see if anyone salutes. Mom and dad went wine tasting Sunday afternoon so it's this or gibberish.- Jubal and The Bumpass Hounds and Kitties
JUBAL'S DAILY DIARY
Started the day as a hero! When the sound of the newspaper delivery guy stopping by the mailbox for his delivery roused me from my deep slumber, the fumbling with the newspaper "mailbox" indicating the paper was much bigger and heavier than normal, I realized that no one in the house was yet awake! I roused my master by licking him in the face and got the other dogs all excited to meet the dawn. JEB is easy to excit. Dad appeared somewhat angry with himself for having overslept, he was shouting and waving his arms. His ill temper even seemed directed at me a bit, which is silly since it is I who saved him from being fired; it was probably something that JEB or Shelby did that annoyed him. Mom wanted to play cause she was hiding under her pillow. Funny thing though: after dad and me went out to the mailbox to get the paper, with a quick stop for me along the way, dad didn't go into work, but spent the morning leafing through the large newspaper and drinking coffee. He seems to do this once a week and I don't know why.
Invaders! The people who live next door came out into their yard, obviously getting ready to lay siege to our house. Snarling and barking, I let them know in no uncertain terms that I was prepared to tear them from limb to limb it they came any closer, and was able to repel the invasion. This is an almost daily occurrence; you'd think they'd learn. My master added his voice to the fray as well, yelling angrily. I am sure the people couldn't hear him, but it was nice of him to lend his support.
Our breakfast was late. Too much important news in the "Sports" paper I guess. I don't know why dad doesn't keep a big bowl full of food for us like he does for the cats down in the utility closet. Too bad I can't fit through that little teenie weenie door; lucky cats. Boru always wants to share my treats but does he ever share - fat chance. If I "talk" to mom I'm sure that she'll give me and Homer a chewie. Glad the other guys are all out in the paddock.
Out in the yard with the masses. I was forced to move, as the patch of sun in which I was lying had, for some reason, slid over a few feet. Sometimes it gets real dark when Shiloh stand near me and blocks the sun. Kinda like that movie "Cast a Giant Shadow." It's not easy being a dog.
I have the most thoughtful dad in the world! While it's true he left me alone in the house for several hours, he did set out an extra treat just for me on the kitchen counter. It was even gift-wrapped, a courtesy I wish he'd skipped, since it led to me having a lot of plastic in my teeth. The steak was delicious, though kinda still frozen in the center. I don't want to seem ungrateful, but crunching through two inches of rock-hard beef is hardly my idea of a delicacy.
Most unpleasant experience when my mom and dad returned home, dad was furious that I had not eaten the plastic wrap that had been covering my present. He kept pointing at the small pieces of Styrofoam and other debris and raving in a most irrational fashion. I'm sorry, but he should know that I can't eat that stuff; it makes my stomach upset. Mom was soooo mad at him that she started to cry. When dad began rolling up a newspaper I realized he'd lost all reason and bolted for the front door which, fortunately, he had left open just a crack.
Spent the afternoon with the girls; well with Abby and Shelby, Shiloh plays too "ruff." A most productive day; I was able to mark territory from one end of the paddock to the other. "Drip 'til you drop" is our motto. We had a small snack at an outdoor cafe we like by the fence gate, with meat scraps and bread served out of circular containers with easily displaced lids. Ran over by the back fence near that rogue Sebastian's yard, who lifted his leg with irritating nonchalance, does he think I don't know about his obsession with FooFoo, that snotty schnauzer from down the road? Last month there wasn't a male in the neighborhood who couldn't be found outside her fence, and Sebastian was at the head of the pack. I let him know I want nothing more to do with him.
What a treat! While sunning by the deck, a flock of ravens drew my attention to a squirrel behind our shed that appeared to have died from overeating. After several days in the sun, the aroma was so delicious it made my nose quiver. I rolled in the wondrous fragrance for several minutes, and when I stood up I positively radiated 'Eau de dead squirrel! Let Sebastian drool over FooFoo, he doesn't know what he's missing.
Of all the times to get a bath! My master, still in a foul mood, made me stand outside in the chill air while he shampooed and rinsed me several times. Why don't JEB and Homer want a bath? How come they're inside where it's warm? Every time I shook the water from my fur dad, too, became drenched, and in the end he was shivering. Why in the world does he do stuff like this?
I ate after all the other guys 'cause I had to dry in the laundry room. Now it's time to sleep, while mom and dad watch the TV box. I want to get some sleep cause I gotta make sure dad gets up real early again tomorrow so he won't be late for work. Ah, the life of a dog.
Baby JEB with Big Jubes (Jubal)
Jubal: Hey JEB, why don't blind people like to sky dive?
JEB: I don't know Jubes, why don't blind people like to sky dive?
Jubal: Because it scares the dog!
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